Val's Narrative

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Saying goodbye to you wasn’t fun at first. I don’t think it was ever supposed to be. Leaving you behind with the question of when I would see you again was heartbreaking for a 6 year old. But the absence of you, was the opportunity for someone else. 

He’ll never be better than you, Venezuela. He doesn’t have your culture, or my family, or my young memories. But he gave me new friends, new memories, and privileged opportunities you couldn’t even dream of. Opportunities you couldn’t offer me. 

I can’t help but feel your accusatory stare. All of the time. Every success I gain with Him, you taunt me with a selfish gaze. You’re good at making me feel guilty. 

And so I’m always tempted to apologize to you. Tempted. But I know better. 

Venezuela, I love you, and I always will. Nothing was your fault, I know that. But I also know I had to leave, for me. And I know that deep down, you know that too.  

So, no, saying goodbye wasn’t fun. Not initially, and not for a while after my departure. But now, you’ve become a hum in my mind while I laugh with my english-speaking friends. I can’t help but feel happy with the life I’ve built with America. 

But don’t worry, love, I never forgot you. Maybe I’m not with you anymore, but you’re with me. 

You’re with me when I have to speak Spanish with mom, because that’s all she knows. 

You’re with me when I savor those arepas you make so well. 

You’re with me when I hear your songs, filled with tambourine beats. 

You’re always with me, Venezuela. I can’t escape you and I hope I never will.